Disclaimer: This might not make sense to many people, but I know for sure it will to a particular few.
1 Corinthians 16:12-14(The Message)
12About our friend Apollos, I've done my best to get him to pay you a visit, but haven't talked him into it yet. He doesn't think this is the right time. But there will be a "right time."
13-14Keep your eyes open, hold tight to your convictions, give it all you've got, be resolute, and love without stopping.
It seems, at least in my life, that there are constantly things that make me uncomfortable. Some more so than others, but none-the-less plenty of situations that I dont want to put myself into. In a generation where the word 'creepy' gets used as much as ones name, and awkward people are so prevalent that they have their own mascot, the awkward turtle, its easy to see why people would want to dodge certain situations or groups of company. On a more serious note there are events in our lives where we have felt wronged or even that we have wronged another and not only do we no longer feel comfortable in their presence we also do not feel that we need/should be in there presence.
In the past few weeks I have began to grow distant to a group of people that were like family to me... better yet they were family to me. A few disagreements, bad decisions, and lack of communication, turned a once healthy and fruitful relationship into an awkward and tattered relationship.
The fact of the matter is that reconciliation takes time, and forgiveness is love and that wounds need to be healed, yes, I got that. But does this mean that I have to jump back into the group and be buddy buddy,does it mean that I really even have to be in that setting ever again?
My problem with some peoples view of reconciliation is that it ends when everything is normal again. I have no trouble forgiving people and situations, I really have no trouble moving on and forgetting it ever happened either, but people grow apart. Change is good. Getting away from the norm is not only healthy but it has the opportunity to open our eyes to so much that we may have been missing.
Paul should have been talking about me here instead of Apollos as far as I am concerned. I dont like anyone or anything any less, I just need time for seperation, time to spread out and grow, time to see what else God is revealing. Until then "keep your eyes open, hold tight to your convictions, give it all you've got, be resolute, and love without stopping." I sure as heck am trying to.
I love you guys, I really do. Soon it will be 'the right time.'